A Queer Life

"Three," we said unanimously about the crazy looking woman walking in the library door.  "And the only reason she gets such a high score is because she is so interesting," Jaime elaborated.  We had been rating people at work for several weeks now; it passed the time and gave us a few laughs. But one day we looked at each other. "We never rate ourselves," I said.  "I'm too scared," he said.  "Yeah." "And really it depends on the day," he added. "Yeah." I looked down, afraid to meet his eye. I didn't want his harsh eye judging me. I didn't even want to judge myself. "Some days I might be as low as a four and others I might be a ten. Depending on how my eyebrows look. Or how skinny I feel. And doesn't personality have a lot to do with attraction?" "Yeah." "A person can increase their score by three or four points just by putting a little effort into their look, having a little co...

It was 2012. I sat on a grassy knoll talking to a friend during a church activity. It was May, the weather was lovely. The details of that moment are still vivid fourteen years later. I remember my white pants and the freckles on my friend's nose.  "It is May," I said.  "Yeah," she closed her eyes under the sunshine with a smile. "It's nice." "In January I saw a flyer for an event in March," I said. "I remember at the time thinking: March is so far away, it will never come. But it will. It did. And now it's May." "Time is like that," she said, blinking and squinting to find her kids. Once satisfied, she leaned back on her elbows in the grass. "There was a day when 2012 seemed like a fantasy. Now it is here. And there will be a day when 2012 is a distant memory and it will only become more distant." "Hmmm." "Time just keeps going. Teasing us and stomping on us and soothing us all at once....